We have all heard the saying that modesty adorns a person, and so it really is, but to what extent does this principle of life apply specifically to communication by correspondence? The first thing that stops many girls is modesty, they are afraid to write the first to some man, because they believe that it is a man who should, as they say, hunt for a girl. And they are right in a way, because every man is a hunter at heart.

In fact, if a girl takes too much initiative, if she tries to get a man, then automatically the man s interest in this girl fades away. Some girls who are not inherent in excessive modesty, seeing the account of a man they like, overwhelm him with compliments. This is also an extreme that should be avoided, since any man wants a girl to be unavailable at first, he wants to gradually reveal it. That is, if we are talking about a serious relationship, then this process should nevertheless develop gradually. When communicating by correspondence, these two extremes should be avoided.

Work on bugs

The first thing to do if you like a young man is to write to him, and you shouldn t be afraid to do it first, you just need to do it correctly, avoiding three main mistakes:

  • To give a compliment, that is, you must be inaccessible to your future chosen one, you must be a mystery to him. Giving a man with compliments, a woman, as it were, demonstrates her availability, and a man is already forming a more frivolous attitude towards her.
  • You should not write in the first sentence: “Let s get to know each other”, this phrase also deprives the acquaintance of riddles and intrigue and looks too straightforward.
  • You should not send a banal message to a man like “Good day”, “Good evening”, “How are you?” All these phrases are too overwritten and for sure the man has already received similar messages from different girls more than once, so most likely he will not even pay attention to such a remark.

Write about what is interesting to him

What is then worth writing in this case? First of all, carefully study the information contained in the account of the man you are interested in… Pay special attention to the “Interests” column. That is, your main task is to choose a specific one among his interests and ask a question about his hobby. That is, if, for example, fishing is among the interests of your potential chosen one, you can ask the question: “What is the largest fish you managed to catch?” At the same time, asking such questions, you do not lose your mystery, and even if the guy does not answer you, this should not hurt or offend you.

What should be your first message?

A few more tips on what the first message should be to a man you like. It should be light, unobtrusive and written without mistakes, because guys pay attention to such nuances and, based on this, begin to form the first impression of you. Before writing something to a young man, you should tidy up your account, namely, delete your photos with your ex-boyfriend, delete other unsuccessful photos, with alcohol, with cigarettes, and others.

When chatting with a man, use all your originality and sense of humor. Do not be afraid to ask questions, as you are the initiator of the conversation and it is you who should conduct it, however, the questions should be superficial, you should not ask him too personal questions. It is unlikely that a young man wants to open his soul to a stranger, but from your side it will look at least tactless.

How and when to end the conversation?

If the guy does not respond to your messages – do not intrude, it is better to try in a couple of days. If you still managed to start a correspondence with a young man, then you should definitely catch the moment when the dialogue is already becoming uninteresting, emotionally meager, then it is better to stop communication in time and say goodbye. because the main thing is to leave this at a height, at the peak, so that later he will have a pleasant memory of you, and he already wants to write to you himself. It turns out that guys have a special relationship with emoticons. They need to be put approximately every 5-7 messages, and the easier they are to start with, the better, it is better to leave all sorts of intricate hearts and kisses for later, and not for the first or even for the second conversation.

Product face

One more thing – on the avatar you should have no one else, namely your photo, because after a successful virtual communication, in a real meeting, a man may be simply disappointed, because a completely different girl will come to meet him, and not that one. that he expected to see. Therefore, if you liked the guy so much that you decided to start a correspondence with him, therefore, for sure in the future you will want to meet with him, so from the very beginning it is better to be yourself.

Phrase that sparks genuine interest

And finally, an example of a specific phrase that will arouse strong interest in a man. To a very stylish, handsome, well-groomed man who is successful and rich, and certainly not deprived of female attention, you can say the following phrase: “I noticed one very interesting quality in you that women usually like very much, but I consider it rather a disadvantage than an advantage”.

To the average man who does not bathe in female compliments, you say the phrase: “You know, I noticed a quality in you that women usually don t like in men, but I appreciate it.” It does not matter what type of men your potential chosen one belongs to, in any case he will have a great interest, he will begin to interrogate you, what you noticed, because this directly concerns his personality, and nothing is as interesting to a man as he is, it is interesting mysteriously and will surely stir his imagination. And at this moment, the most important thing is not to answer this question. Simply say, “You’ll know when the time is right,” and change the topic of the conversation. If you give an answer to this question – you will ruin everything, let him wait and think about it. Use this trick and you are guaranteed to get the interest you want.

And remember, the important advantages of virtual communication are, firstly, that you have the opportunity to think, so you should never rush to answer, think carefully about your messages, show all your erudition and imagination. And, secondly, another advantage is that while communicating virtually, you feel more relaxed and courageous, so use these privileges and look for your destiny!

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  • Posted in
  • Male psychology
  • Psychology of communication

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